Ideas and Musings, My Noodle

Life Force Leakage

I’ve been thinking about all the years that have been sliced off my life. For a long time, I had it in my noodle that the years were sliced off from the end. Smoke too much? Die at 96 rather than 100. Severe trauma in your life? Now you’re at 94. Lost your arm in a car crash? Now you’re at 92.

There are all sorts of sayings that imply this idea. Most of them are some variation of:

<That thing> just shaved years off my life!

We laugh about it because laughing in the face of fear and trauma is powerful. Comedy is the other face of tragedy.

But what if we’re looking at all this shaving wrong?

My Insomnia

I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in weeks. It’s very scary because when I was in my 40’s I spent a decade rarely sleeping. I was insane most of the time.

You could say that insomnia “shaved years off my life.”

It’s true, I can feel it. I’m surprised I’m still alive. (I credit my survival to Energy Medicine.)

And I don’t think I can do that again.

There’s also another thing people say… “You can catch up on your sleep.”

I can tell you from personal experience that you can never catch up on your sleep. If you miss any sleep, it’s gone. You never get it back. Oh, you may feel better rested after a while but it’s not like you get it back. It’s like Time. If you don’t snooze, you lose.

Insomnia in the Age of Covid-19 is no fun.

I find myself insane again. Things that would have just annoyed me hijack my noodle. I start thinking things like “self-righteous people who say dumbass things are evil.” And there is both a part of me that thinks this is silly and a part of me that thinks it’s true.

I really am tired of self-righteous people. I wish they would shut the fuck up. Let the experts have the speaking stick.

But my issues with humanity is not really the purpose of this article. No, I’m thinking about the years that have been shaved off my life.

Shaving of Years

I believe that what really happens is this…

We are born with a finite quantity of Life Force. This Life Force stretches out over a person’s lifetime toward Death.

Note: I’m not taking accidents, murders, acts of nature that can whomp us anytime, into consideration here.

So, if you have a human who has a full quiver of Life Force, you might expect them to live to, say 100 for our purposes. The Life Force would be spread out over their lifetime.

Warning! I’m making up numbers here as an example only!

As things happen to you, especially traumas, more energy is needed to deal with the situations, and the quantity of Life Force depletes. But this doesn’t just chop off years at the end. No. it recalculates the remaining quantity of Life Force and then redistributes it over the remaining years.

Over time, Life Force gets weaker and weaker. This explains why older people still see themselves as young people but have a hard time getting out of the chair or up the stairs.

If you have a lot of trauma, or in my case, trauma, illness, and insomnia, the Life Force gets used up quickly. I’m not as resilient as I could be.

Eventually, the Life Force is so low, the persons immune system so weak, that it doesn’t take much to kill them.

I’m making up numbers, but one thing is true. I am at risk.

Note: This varies from human to human because sometimes the parents do bad things and reduce your Life Force before you are even born. You might start the game disadvantaged.

This is what makes us old. This is how we die.

What Do We Do?

I have no idea! But one thing is for sure, I’m trying to find a way to replenish my Life Force. Plug up the Life Force Leak.

First is to put a stop to the leaks. Get healthy. Stay away from dumbasses. Find something that feeds my soul. Find people who fit.

Then, replenish.

How do I do this? So far, I don’t really know. I think about how everything is energy. Matter is energy. Energy is all around me. Why can’t I tap into that energy and replenish myself? What do I have to do?

No idea!

But it does sound like it should be possible.

That’s my current goal. I want to replenish myself. I’m a bit too at risk at the moment. And I’m not ready to pass away yet.

Wish me luck!