Ideas and Musings

5th time’s a charm…

It was surreal, landing into LAX on Saturday. I was looking out the window and I didn’t really know where we were over the city. I kept thinking, oh, there’s the 405! But it wasn’t. Which way is north? Where is downtown? I thought I saw it and felt better about getting my bearings. Then there was another bunch of buildings that could be downtown. I’d forgotten how big this place actually is.

This is the fifth time I’ve been to LA. The first time was a trip when I was 19. Me and my best friend Diane took a Greyhound bus all the way from Omaha. (a guy nicely asked Diane for a blow job) We stayed with her brother in his studio apartment. We got a bit confused because the men barked at us. Woof! Woof! Well, back home in Omaha, the only reason men barked at you was because they thought YOU were a dog. Here they bark because THEY are dogs. I guess a couple of 19 years olds from Omaha were some hot stuff!

The second time was about 10 years ago, I think, I have no concept of time. I stayed in a hostel on Venice Beach. Strange hostel. No boys and girls rooms. I shared with 3 young men I didn’t know. Very odd and probably unsettling for them.

The third time I stayed at the Motel 6 right off Hollywood Blvd. I came down for a month long intensive at the Acting Corp. The Actors Bootcamp. That month is another story involving a crazy man and a wild ride through town at 3am. Anyways…..

I’d come down for that month to get a feel of LA. I was thinking about coming down to live and to go forward in my acting career. Staying in Hollywood and taking classes in North Hollywood 5 days a week and going to the beach in Santa Monica on the weekends didn’t really give me a good feel for LA. But within months of returning to Seattle, I had it planned out. I knew where I was going to stay. I’d already met Dave Radowski at Second City and was planning on doing some things with them. I had a little money and I was CONFIDENT that I would find work soon.

In May, I came down. I towed a trailer behind my little Toyota with all my stuff. I was in LA for about 3 months…I think. It might have been 2. Then I went back to Seattle. Tail so far between my legs I could flip it over my shoulder. I did everything wrong…. And I did everything right…

Now I’m down here again for just a week, taking a character class at Second City. I know that I did everything wrong last time, and I would do it again. Why? Because it brought me to where I am right now. I’m a lot less ego impaired and have a better sense of myself. The fourth time took me to my depths and it took everything I had to get myself out of it. It led me to Energy Medicine and a whole new world.

Initial impressions: I can’t tell if it’s going to rain or if it’s just smoggy. My sinuses are complaining bitterly. People still drive like maniacs. There seems to be more sexy lingerie stores since I’ve been here. Popeyes is still there. I keep telling myself that the asshole that worked there last time is probably not there anymore. The tourists still lose their minds when they come here and walk around in a daze. The boys working the front desk at my motel don’t know enough to not talk about the cute girls staying there in front of the other guests. Woo hoo! There’s a fridge in my room but no clock. There’s HBO but no On Demand (I’m terrorized by the idea that I STILL have to wait for the DVD to come out for season 2 of TRUE BLOOD! Maybe I can bribe Becky..). And something suspicious is going on in the room above me. Why oh why can’t I be on the 5th floor?

I met a TV producer named Chris, for what network he wouldn’t tell me and I think he didn’t want to tell me what he did in the first place. He and his girlfriend were having drinks at Barney’s Beanery. His goal was to impress upon Victoria THE WAY IT IS in LA. She was a bit naïve about it and wanted to believe the best of everyone. It’s too bad that LA is a place you can’t automatically do that. They were both very cool and might meet up with me at some cowboy place on Sunset on Friday.

There’s this local custom, I think, of saying things to nonlocals to make them think that they think they are someone. I remember 3 years ago, these girls coming up to me as I walked down Melrose saying “You look like you’re someone…are you someone?” I just laughed at them. It’s a joke, people swarm in hoping for the World, heck, the Universe. The locals are still playing this game….I guess I look like someone who wants other people to think I’m someone and say that I look like I’m someone when I’m not someone. But I AM someone of course, just not in their reality. 🙂

It was surreal, landing into LAX on Saturday. I thought about the past and knew that this trip was going to show me what I really wanted. I’d changed my phone number to a CA number and never changed it back. I was never quite sure I was going to stay in Seattle. I thought to myself, when I’m sure I’m not going back to LA, then I’ll change my phone number. It’s Monday and so far, I still don’t know.

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